Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
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