what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
Randomize
