hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
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