'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
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