Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
He's on the porch naked. Help.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
