awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Randomize
