what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
