So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Randomize
