And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
