those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Randomize
