she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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