Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
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