I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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