She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
