There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
Randomize
