I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
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