just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
Randomize
