Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
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