brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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