At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Randomize
