champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Randomize
