My room smells like vodka and shame
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
