i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Randomize
