ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Randomize
