It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
Randomize