Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
I forgot how hot balto sounded
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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