Christians are straight up FREAKS
Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Randomize
