he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
