i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
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