Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
Randomize
