watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize