listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
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