Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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