Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
