i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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