This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
