I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
