I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Randomize
