you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
Randomize
