That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
Randomize
