Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
