Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
