Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
whose ass print is on the piano?
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Randomize
