I must be too annoying 4 u.
i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
