This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
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