Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
