susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Randomize