Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
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