Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
my being single is dangerous.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Randomize
