Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
